My parents will not be home tonight! I'm gonna have SEX! LOL, joking. My sister will prepare dinner tonight. And I'll do some dessert that my mom is expecting me to do it tonight. And.. my bro.. He's useless in the kitchen. Serious.
Okay.. Mmm. Internet connection sucks. : p
I thought of this before. Let's say if I really have a boyfriend like... serious relationship. There are few flaws I have. And hopefully, when he found my flaw, he will think what I'm predicting. There are few examples I have thought so I'm gonna share them with you readers. : )
1. When we hold hands, my palms are rough. He will probably think "Ew." The truth why my palms are rough is because of washing the dishes without wearing a glove. The chemical of the thingy have cost damaged to my skin. So it'll go rough right? Yup.
2. When he touch my hair, it's f-ing rough and it hurts people. He must be thinking "Ouch!" And the truth is that my parents don't like hair saloon and had experienced the worst before. So they don't want me to do my hair there. My mom cuts my hair. : ) She used to learnt to do some hair dressing etc. And another fact is, I swim. When I was young, I don't wash my hair after swimming. And I'm not very fond of swimming cap. And I was stupid to know that there's chlorine in the pool. That's why my hair is rough and damaged. : ) My girls knew my hair really hurt people. Sorry, guys.
3. When he puts his arm over me and his hands ended up on my upper arm. It has skin problem there. KL said it caused by the hot water when we took shower. But err. Guys must think "WTF is that?" The truth is, I was not gifted by a smooth skin. But I did try my best to get rid of it. I have been applying this f-ing smelly cream that the pharmacist gave. But no luck. It won't work. Pfft. So bare with it, guys.
4. IF he ever put his hands on my thighs, they will feel a lil stretch marks over there. And guys will think "Shit, what the heck is that?!" The truth is, every girl have stretch marks on their thighs or their hips. And hey, its not my fault. Its not like I'm pure perfection. And my thighs must be bigger than yours, fella.
5. IF he ever put his hands on my legs, he will think "Fck, what did I just feel?!" Well, the truth is my leg is like plastic & shiny. LOL. Some people noticed that. And its f-ing DRY and DEHYDRATED. Yes, I tried fixing that before. Same, no luck. : /
6. IF he ever touch my boobs by accident, well, sorry to disappoint. Guys will think "Shit, that was fcking small!" Heheh. Hey, genetics. If you don't like my small boobs, go to the prostitutes with bigger boobs. And if you ever say "Do plastic surgery." Oh ho ho, you're a dead piece of shit. I want to elaborate that further but I'm not evil right now. So guys, if you really care about the size of boobs, you're not human. Imagine how would I feel.
7. When he plays with my fingers, he would think "What the shit, its so wrinkly!" HAHAHA! Well, its bony, forgive me. I inherited from my mom. And the only thing I like about myself - physically - is probably my fingers. Its just like my mom's. And I'm proud of it. And my nails are always clean so : ) don't worry. And speaking of fingers, I don't wear rings. Surprisingly, my finger grew a lil' bigger. Maybe because I've been cracking my knuckles like mad. So guys, before you give me a ring, you better tell me first. Cause it won't be the perfect size. : )
8. If you ever pinch my cheeks, guys will think "Shit, are all these chubs!?" HAHHAA! Guys, seriously, I do have baby chubs left. I don't know why but its still there. Keeps me young and chubby eh? : D If you say "DO some liposuction." Oh ho ho, I'll lipo your dick! Ugh, weird image. Not being evil now.
9. If they ever kiss me, guys will think "Holy shyte, did I just kiss a rock!?" HAHAHA. I don't want to say it scientifically. I just, well, I don't possess a smooth, full lips. Sometimes, my lips will crack and bleeds. But not to worry, I bought a chap stick! : D And its healing slowly now. Yay! Happy now? You may kiss peacefully now. (Fyi, I never been kissed yet so : D)
10. If I ever wear a bikini, sorry to disappoint dude. With my fat stomach and small boobs will not do any good image on a bikini. So guys, I will never wear a bikini. Since yeah.. : DI prefer not to go swimming with guys at all. They can be such a fussy people. They start complaining all the things girls are lack of. Pfft.
Oh, its already 10 examples! Well, that's all I can think of right now. There's more, of course. I haven't talked about the personality yet. : ) I will talk about it tonight. Facts about SK. LOL. Cool title. Wait, lemme add that to the title. There. I hope you enjoy me bragging about myself! And hey, its a good topic to talk about!
Bye : D
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